A few weeks back there was a lot of chatter on the House of Bishops and Deputies Listserve about what kind of person made a good representative of Christ and would therefore be suitable for ordination. -- Don’t even get me going on the screwed up nature of that kind of thinking. I have never had a priest who I thought was much like Jesus, on the altar or off. Any who… -- The Bishops and Deputies were discussing it.

What I realized is that the very best representative of Christ I have in my life is Rowan Williams, my dog.

For one thing, he is perfect in form. This is part fo what the Bishops and Deputies were discussing: Could a handicapped person represent Christ. I’m not kidding, that really came up. These are the people leading our church. Oy veigh… Rowan, though, unlike the obese and unattractive clergy I usually see around here, is perfect. He is thin, can run fast, jump high, and catch flies often on the very first try. I’d like to see a priest who can do that.

Although Rowan is a homosexual, he is in the closet and lies about it when asked. It is certainly Christlike to lie about yourself because it might make others feel more comfortable. Jesus was all about smooth sailing, not rocking the boat, you know. He told people what they wanted to hear. That’s what good priests do. Alas, speaking seriously now, it would appear to be what ALL priests do.

Rowan’s love is sure. Solid as a rock. Unwavering. Even if I am late with dinner, or if I fail to put the gravy on it, or whatever… Rowan is quick to forgive. Love forgives everything. You never do know when your priest is going to turn on you, though. But you can be certain that once they do, you’re out of church forever. No forgiveness for you my friend.

Rowan’s chief delight, beyond treats or swimming or anything else, is for me to put aside what I am doing and spend time with him. Just me and him. Petting, brushing, talking, or just sitting together. Rowan just wants to be with me. That may be his most Christlike attribute of all.