Today I thought about Ken. One of my oldest friends. Not one of those friends whom you know in college, but not in real life; Or, the kind you know from this job or that job… Ken was a real life friend. In college, yes. But, beyond too.

Didn’t see him very often. In fact, recently our relationship was mainly him emailing me things I deleted without reading. I never doubted Ken’s friendship. Ken and James… I never doubt those two. Bob. Everyone else, I think they secretly hate me.

Ken died yesterday.

Been thinking about that a lot.

I will not miss his jokes or his emails. Clearly, I don’t even miss his presence or the sound of his voice since I never went to see him or called him on the phone. But, I will miss the constancy of knowing he was there. Ken loved me. He was my friend. You know what it says in the Bible: “A friend loves you all the time even if you suck.” That’s the kind of friend he was. I am not sure that all that many people can pull off that kind of friendship, that constancy of love.

Ken collected things: Stamps, coins, crap of all kinds. He gave me some of the better stuff once.

Ken is the only person who ever made me a mix tape.

Ken gave me his GNT when I started Greek at Howard Payne. I still have it. Still use it. His name is written on the inside in fat magic marker. I never thought about it before but now I am glad.

When I was the editor of a small town newspaper, Ken gave me a dictionary. I still have that too. He wrote me a long note in the front adjuring me to use it.

When I went to work for the Republicans he didn’t give up on me.

Our worlds grew apart over the years. But the love… that stayed.

Been thinking about Ken today.